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Concession Food Item of the Week: The Hawk Dog

How does one build on perfection? Coming off a season in which they made the outcome of the Super Bowl little more than a formality after the first quarter, the Seattle Seahawks are at the top of the sports world. But there is yet one frontier to conquer: hot dogs. Fear not, brave patrons of CenturyLink Field -- no longer will you be forced to snack on 7" hot dogs like some kind of imbecile... 

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WHAT DO THEY CALL THIS WITCHCRAFT?: The Hawk Dog

WHAT COMPRISES SUCH A THING?: Hot dog topped with chipotle cheese sauce, Pico De Gallo, diced red peppers, diced jalapenos, sour cream, and guacamole with blue and green tortilla strips.​ It's like a fiesta in your mouth if that fiesta was on steroids and lasted for eternity.

WHO HATH WROUGHT THIS MONSTROSITY: CenturyLink Field, home of the Seattle Seahawks.

HOW MASSIVE IS THIS WORK OF SHEER AND UTTER GENIUS?: 24 inches

AND HOW MUCH DOES IT COST?: $24.

THAT'S LIKE, A DOLLAR PER INCH OF AMAZING: Wow you're some kind of mathematical genius.

SHOULD I EAT THIS ALONE OR SHARE IT: It all depends on how American you are. 

Concession Food Item Hall of Champions:

Crab Mac & Cheese Dog

Potachos

The Beast

The Boomstick

The StrasBurger

The Baco

The Pulled Pork Parfait

The Banana Split Helmet Sundae

The Shake'n Bacon Brew