Might the NBA Western Conference playoffs devolve into Maim That Tune? Los Angeles Lakers center Shaquille O'Neal appears in the documentary I Am Your Child (ABC, Monday, 8 p.m.), crooning The Itsy Bitsy Spider. Shaq sounds better than Utah's Karl Malone. On Fired Up ( NBC, Thursday, 9:30 p.m.) the Jazz singer plays himself but takes on the persona of a frustrated performer-playwright. Malone's cameo features a cacophonous snatch of an unidentifiable tune, but you'll have to wait until the sitcom's final 30 seconds to hear it.