You Never Know Which Court Musselman Will Show Up On
It happens to the best of men, usually in their 40s.
It's embarrassing and downright disappointing to their wives to the point they can barely look their husband in the eyes.
The worst part is when everyone around him notices too.
That's right. Another man caught listening to an Eric Musselman pep talk at an elementary school music performance.
It happened to me just this evening.
There I was sitting basically alone in a plastic chair in the middle of the gym next to a four-square taped off on the gray rubberized court watching Musselman's recent Halloween themed "Hustle and Compete" speech.
Just as Musselman started pondering the words of his father all day while at school, large crowds of parents poured through the doors jostling for the best vantage point to best watch their child sing through a cell phone screen instead of watching with their own eyes.
Things filled quickly with the exception of the two seats beside me. That's when one unfortunate young lady barely out of her teen years filled the space.
Things immediately got loud so I cranked up the Musselman and held the speaker close to my ear, straining to hear him talk about his observations of the other trick-or-treaters in his childhood neighborhood.
That was mistake No. 1.
Mistake No. 2 was not recognizing the signature Eric Musselman crescendo waiting to explode into the microphone.
"I was running! I was running up that drive way! Mister, can I have some candy!"
I immediately jerked from the scream that split my eardrum. The ringing in my ears, straight out of a movie scene, meant it took a second to realize my chair had clanked into the young lady next to me.
The look in her eyes made it clear she had heard Musselman also and deemed it the mutterings of a mad man.
Having dropped the phone in the process, I scooped it up and turned it down a bit before Musselman could start raving again about his sugar hustle.
Fortunately, Musselman wrapped just as the kids filed in to take their place on the color-coded risers. The man's a fine speaker, but had he gone a sentence longer, he would have been cut off.
He's one of the best in the business and seems poised to prove it in the most successful way possible this year, but no one will ever be that good.
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