Sometimes, It's Not About The Rivalry

An emotional Iowa-ISU game ends with hugs and tears.

He was a son grieving for his father.

Iowa State women’s basketball coach Bill Fennelly approached the team that had just beaten his team.

He shook hands with Iowa coach Lisa Bluder, who hugged him, as she had done before the game.

Senior guard Kathleen Doyle, who hit the final two free throws in the Hawkeyes’ 75-69 win at Hilton Coliseum on Wednesday, was the first player in the handshake line and she, too, hugged Fennelly.

So, too, did senior guard Amanda Ollinger, who grew up in Cedar Rapids.

The last Iowa players in the line were senior Makenzie Meyer and her freshman sister, Megan, from Mason City. Fennelly hugged both at the same time.

A game is a game, a rivalry is a rivalry, and life is life.

A couple of hours earlier, before the game, Fennelly stood near midcourt, head down, during the moment of silence for his father, William, who died Wednesday morning.

When the moment had ended, Fennelly walked toward the end line, wiping his face with the towel he had been holding. Then someone gave him a clipboard and a marker, and he began writing.

It was time to coach.

After the game, when he was done being a coach for the night, Fennelly fought the tears.

He talked about the hugs. He talked about earlier in the day, when Iowa associate head coach Jan Jensen sent a text message with her condolences.

He talked about his rival.

“All their players, the staff, were incredible before and after the game,” Fennelly said. “That’s something I want to make sure everyone hears, because this rivalry can get a little bit over the top. But they couldn’t have been more gracious in how they handled the situation.”

“I can’t imagine,” Bluder said, “coaching a game after losing his father today.”

He did, and the Hawkeyes and Cyclones played.

Rivalry games are typically loud and chippy, and this was no different.

Early in the first quarter, Doyle and Iowa State guard Ashley Joens became tangled going for a rebound. When Doyle was whistled for the foul, she ran from the call, arguing her case to anyone who would listen.

The Hawkeyes and Cyclones pushed and shoved, because it's a constant push-and-shove between these two programs.

Bluder and Fennelly have been in constant battle for the state’s talent over the years, and such recruiting battles have their own heat. Win some, lose some, and keep going.

This was a game the state could appreciate. Ollinger had two points, but 20 rebounds. Makenzie Meyer had 18. Joens, from Iowa City, had a game-high 26 points and 12 rebounds.

Rivalries fuel the best games, even on the worst of days.

“It was a hard day, obviously,” Fennelly said. “But I had so many people reach out to us. And our family is — and I know a lot of families are — is so connected. My name is the same as my dad’s, my son’s is the same as my dad’s, my grandson’s name is the same as my dad, for a reason.”

His father, Fennelly said, would have had his regular opinion on the game.

“I’m sure he’s yelling at me for not calling timeouts sooner and why did I sub,” Bill said. “Like he usually does.

“He’s been with me since I got the job, and he hasn’t missed much. And I’m really lucky for that. Really, thank God he got to see me and my family at a place that we love so much, and that he loved.

This rivalry is noisy, from January 1 to December 31. The two men’s basketball teams will play on Thursday night at Hilton, and it will be loud and draw a crowd. There will be words, during and after. Last year there were words and shoves, during and after.

Forty minutes of court time are always about the game, deciding a winner who has a year to brag, a defeated team to figure out what to do the next time.

A few minutes of hugs, before and after this one, were about reality.

A game is a game, a rivalry is a rivalry.

And life is life.