Ballers Power Rankings: Episode 7, ‘Everybody Knows’

It was a rough week for Spencer on HBO’s Ballers.

Welcome to Extra Mustard’s weekly Ballers power rankings (click here for last week’s rankings). This week, in Season 2, Episode 7, Spencer gets fired, Travis Mack improves his draft stock, and Ricky pauses mid-chicken wing to consider his future.

1. Andre (last week: 2)

Man, Andre is just putting in work left and right. He shows up to Anderson Sports Management just to rub it in Anderson’s face that his company is going downhill, taunting him with an offer to buy the place. Andre knows the NFLPA is going to find out about Spencer’s $6 million loss in that real estate deal, unraveling the company’s relationship to work with Travis Mach. Oh yeah, and he’s got Suh. Good to be Andre right now.

2. Travis Mach (last week: 1)

Tough to knock Travis off the top spot right now, with Mark Schlereth caving in and bumping him up to No. 12 in his mock and Jay Glazer giving him a shot to show off his football IQ. But Andre kind of just won the whole show, momentarily. Mack is probably going in the top five, with Jason but not Spencer. And he slipped in some phenomenal Tom Brady and Giselle smack talk.

3. Charles Greane (last week: 3)

Charles has gone from having absolutely no role in this show two weeks ago to a giant big shot with the Dolphins. He convinces Cooley to re-structure his deal to fit Ricky Jerret, even though he slept with his mother. That’s some serious wheeling and dealing. Rick might not wind up taking the three years and $27 million, but somehow ol’ Chuck got him a comparable offer.

4. Jason (last week: 5)

Look, Jason hasn’t had much screen time, but he’s become a mainstay in the top five. He got Ricky $12 million a year, and hit a long game-sealing jumper in pickup ball. Maybe the best scene of the episode.

5. Ricky Jerret (last week: 7)

Our friend has a difficult decision to make, but that’s a good thing. Either he takes a boatload of money to play in Los Angeles, which screams Ricky Jerret, or he takes less to stick around in Miami. He’ll be great no matter what he does, and he’s smoothed things out with his father.

6. Anderson (last week: not ranked)

Cutting bait with Spencer is probably a good thing, considering he wasn’t really pulling a ton of clients and lost Suh to Andre. Anderson lays into him, and looks to be keeping Joe around, who is good at his job and did turn down a good amount of money last week to stay.

Also, points for the line of the night: “I’m a businessman, not an a–hole.” 

7. Joe Krutel (last week: 6)

He’ll slip a spot because ultimately Spencer’s dismissal means Travis Mach is gone, but generally speaking he’ll be relatively unaffected by that.

8. Jay Glazer (last week: unranked)

Once again, the “ugly, short, bald son of a bitch” had a great episode. Linebacker U is gonna have huge ratings, baby.

9. Spencer Strasmore (last week: 4)

Let’s say No. 10 on this list is rock bottom (seriously, no pun intended) for Spencer. I think we’re actually pretty close but not there. He’s got no job, no license, and perhaps no woman (they haven’t updated us on the Tracy situation). Maybe, on the bright side, the painkiller addiction isn’t a thing anymore? I mean, this is now two episodes without any pill-popping even though Joe found out about the illegal prescription he got under “Mr. Chavez.” Either way, Spence is screwed. It’s anyone’s guess what he’s going to do.

10. Reggie (last week: 9)

Seriously, man, where the hell is Reggie? And Vernon? Damn, that injury really just ruined their character development.

Just Missed: Dennis Jerret...Max...the woman in the sauna...Miami police...Spencer’s tattoo...Joe’s tattoo...Alonzo Cooley