Wednesday’s Hot Clicks: The Lightning Sent the Most Melodramatic Tweet After Their Choke

They gave the fans the old “it’s not you, it’s me.”
Mike Carlson/Getty Images

Honestly one of the biggest chokes in sports history

The Lightning were far and away the best team in the NHL this year, finishing 21 points ahead of the Flames for the best record in the league with the fourth-highest point total in league history. And they didn’t just lose to the Blue Jackets, the worst team in the Eastern Conference playoffs—they got swept. They’re the first President’s Trophy winner to ever fall victim to a first-round sweep.

That’s frustrating and embarrassing, no doubt. But is it frustrating and embarrassing enough to send a totally overwrought message to your fans on Twitter after the final horn that reads like the social media manager swiped it from a draft of a breakup text he was planning on sending to his girlfriend?

Seriously, they’re giving the fans the old “it’s not you, it’s me.” The only thing that could have made it more absurd is if they tweeted it as a screenshot of the iPhone notes app. 

The response to the tweet was quick and hilarious. 

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I can’t wait for the inevitable parodies from other teams as the playoffs continue. 

A night to forget for Steven Matz

Mets pitcher Steven Matz had about as bad an outing as you can ever have, allowing eight runs against the Phillies and not recording a single out. 

You don’t have to be a baseball expert to realize that’s not something a lot of people have done before. 

The Mets’ Twitter account started off the night so hopeful, but that changed quickly.

Who wants free stuff?

UPDATE: Thanks to everyone who entered. Sorry if you missed out. I got over 200 entries in an hour.

It’s almost summer, so how about we do a beach-themed giveaway?

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That’s the folding cooler from Kelty, 45L edition. It’s a collapsible but sturdy cooler that can fit up to 70 cans and keep things cold for up to 36 hours. They sent me a sample and it looks pretty cool. Lightweight when empty and easy to set up and collapse again. 

We’re giving away three of them to the 10th, 50th and 100th person to email me following these exact directions:

Go back to yesterday’s Hot Clicks. Find the number of points the Sixers scored in the third quarter against the Nets. Send me an email (dan.gartland@simail.com) with the subject line cooler giveaway (no quotes, no punctuation, no caps) and the correct answer. One entry per person. If you’re the 10th, 50th or 100th entrant to follow those instructions, you’ll get a Kelty folding cooler (retail price $79.95) sent right to your door.

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Around the sports world

The former general managers of the Chargers and Giants go behind the scenes of the 2004 Eli Manning-Phillip Rivers trade. ... J.J. Watt is giving the commencement address at Wisconsin and was shocked to learn he had to write a speech ahead of time

How did Collin McHugh do this?

Ryan Fitzpatrick says birthday cake made him fat

That’s how you circumvent a ban

Blue Jackets fans were irate that they couldn’t bring brooms to the arena as they attempted to close out the Lightning in a sweep.

But leave it to fans to find a way around that. 

Cristiano Ronaldo’s team got knocked out of the Champions League by a scrappy little Dutch team

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That’s Ajax’s first Champions League semi-final in 22 years. 

Just a brutal Tinder opener

Better safe than sorry

Acuña also did this

Lionel Messi does it again

No arguments here

Not sports

These bugs repair their homes by killing themselves and letting their guts patch up holes. ... A New Jersey dentist’s sexy mannequin lawn display is tearing his neighborhood apart, but he keeps bringing it back. ... The video game Assassin’s Creedcould be used to help rebuild Notre Dame. ... A Florida man is accused of filling a water gun with urine and shooting his neighbor with it. ... When a Broadway play calls for Ethan Hawke to trash a kitchen, someone has to put it all back together.

AWWW YEAAAHH

Just a kangaroo causing havoc at a millionaire tobacco tycoon’s mansion

Extremely relatable

A good song

Email dan.gartland@simail.com with any feedback or follow me on Twitter for approximately one half-decent baseball joke per week. Bookmark this page to see previous editions of Hot Clicks and find the newest edition every day. By popular request I’ve made a Spotify playlist of the music featured here. Visit our Extra Mustard page throughout each day for more offbeat sports stories.


Published
Dan Gartland
DAN GARTLAND

Dan Gartland is the writer and editor of Sports Illustrated’s flagship daily newsletter, SI:AM, covering everything an educated sports fan needs to know. He joined the SI staff in 2014, having previously been published on Deadspin and Slate. Gartland, a graduate of Fordham University, is a former Sports Jeopardy! champion (Season 1, Episode 5).