The Wildest Quotes From Jim Irsay, Jeff Saturday’s Colts Press Conference

The decision to hire Saturday as interim head coach was a doozy, and so was Monday’s press conference.

On Monday, the Colts fired head coach Frank Reich, and named former player and current ESPN analyst Jeff Saturday as his interim replacement. It was, to say the least, a puzzling decision.

Saturday spent 13 years with the Colts as a player before transitioning to a media role. He’s never coached at the professional or college level—a trait that team owner Jim Irsay touted as a positive when fielding questions about his bold choice.

The move took the entire football world by surprise, Saturday included. He said he was “shocked” when he received the call, and that the whole conversation with Irsay lasted about 12 hours. If anybody tuned in to Monday evening's press conference hoping for clarity surrounding one of the most bizarre NFL decisions in recent memory, they didn’t get what they came for.

What they did hear, though, was a seemingly non-stop flow of some truly incredible answers, ranging from Michael Jordan comparisons to stray shots at analytics for no perceptible reason. Here’s a look at some of the best of the bunch from a press conference that could have doubled as performance art.

1. “We were fortunate he was available.” -Jim Irsay

Available to do what? Speak on the phone? Saturday has been with ESPN for nearly a decade and left his high school coaching job in 2020. It’s safe to say that he wasn’t on anybody’s coaching radar prior to Irsay’s call.

2. “It wasn’t offered to anyone else. I don’t know what Chris (Ballard) and I would have done if he wasn’t available.” -Jim Irsay

Again, it’s the urgency here that makes this so remarkable. How could Irsay possibly believe that Saturday had to be the guy, and that he had to act fast before somebody else beat the Colts to the punch? And given that his first choice was to turn over control of his football team to someone who’s never coached meaningful games before, I sort of believe him when he says he doesn’t know what Plan B would have been had Saturday not said yes.

3. “Why am I a candidate for this?” -Jeff Saturday

Perhaps the most honest, relatable moment of the entire endeavor. Whether or not any of us have ever been NFL coaches before, we’ve all dealt with fits of imposter syndrome. Saturday is clearly not oblivious to his lack of qualifications for this job, but was adequately swayed after speaking to his new boss. I can hear fans and media members nodding enthusiastically in agreement upon hearing Indy’s new coach say these words.

4. “Y’all been kicking the s--- out of me for not drafting wideouts and now we’re underperforming on the offensive line.” -Chris Ballard

Irsay was asked if he believes Ballard would be back next year, to which he replied, “Of course I do.” So Ballard was perhaps speaking with the confidence of a man who’s just been publicly informed of his job security when he voluntarily held up two examples of roster construction shortcomings of his 3-5-1 team. Clearly, this is not an organization that does things the conventional way.

5. “[Saturday] doesn’t have that fear. We were very fortunate he was available. He has tons of experience. He knows this game inside and out.” -Jim Irsay

Irsay punctuated this thought by lobbing a dig at other coaches who he perceived to lean on analytics when faced with daunting in-game situations. Credit Irsay for giving everybody who’s ever interviewed for a job they were unqualified for a go-to answer for why they should be considered for an out-of-their-league position.

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