Clippers’ Steve Ballmer Is Absolutely Ecstatic About the Number of Toilets at New Arena

The always-amped Ballmer brought the energy at Tuesday’s Intuit Dome ceremony.

There’s a subplot in 2009’s Season 7 of Curb Your Enthusiasm in which Larry David—the co-creator of Seinfeld playing a fictional version of himself—launches a reunion of the iconic ’90s sitcom as part of an attempt to win back his ex-wife. In the show-within-a-show, the ever-eccentric George Costanza bemoans his bad luck: He made a fortune inventing an app that located the nearest public restroom—dubbed the “iToilet”—only to lose his earnings as part of the Bernie Madoff Ponzi scheme.

And if George’s app existed today, it would certainly have plenty to find at the Clippers’ new Intuit Dome.

The team gathered at the grounds of its upcoming new arena on Tuesday for a construction milestone ceremony. The proceedings culminated with an impassioned speech by owner Steve Ballmer, who lauded—among other things—the ample amount of porcelain thrones his team’s new home will boast.

La Clippers owner Steve Ballmer fired up about one of the Intuit Dome’s signature features: “Toilets! 1,160 toilets and urinals! Three times the NBA average! … We do not want people waiting around. We want them back to their d—- seats.” pic.twitter.com/Zphre8ZMRL

— Ben Golliver (@BenGolliver) March 7, 2023

If Ballmer belted the word “TOILETS!” at the top of his lungs in order to create a viral moment, then mission accomplished. That clip made the rounds on social media throughout the day, creating an unusual spotlight on Los Angeles’s No. 2 team.

The Intuit Dome is expected to open ahead of the 2024-25 season, so fans in the City of Angels will have to wait just a little bit longer to see all of their roundball restroom dreams realized.