Injury Bugged

Looking back on the 49ers 2020 season, I feel so much empathy towards those players who found their home on the injured reserve.

I’ve been on the IR for far too long.

The thing about my injury is that it isn’t one of a physical nature. It’s a state of mind, really. A constant fog residing in my brain, like the Golden Gate Bridge on a soggy Tuesday morning.

There’s so much I miss about San Francisco. I haven’t been back to the Bay since 2019. Which I guess isn’t too long ago. If we’re gettin’ down to the nitty-gritty details, it’s been ­­842 days since I last attended a 49ers game.

Now that’s a stat worth forgetting, jeez.

Kind of like this past season. I’ve basically put an asterisk beside 2020 in general because sometimes it doesn’t even feel real. Did the Bucs really just win the Super Bowl or are we living in an alternate universe that somehow swapped with reality the night the 49ers lost to the Chiefs one year prior?

But then again, that’s definitely my coping mechanism for the #RevengeTour being cancelled last year.

Let’s go back to San Francisco…

November 5th, 2017 was the last time I stepped foot in Levi’s Stadium. The air in that place smells like home. That’s probably just the incredible aroma of all my favourite game-day snacks, though.

Side note: Guy Fieri’s chicken is most certainly one of the best things I’ve ever put in my mouth.

I miss that food. I also miss the face paint and the weeks of planning my perfect game-day fit. I miss the crowds. And I miss the feeling of watching our team run out onto field. Even though the team was a dishevelled mess back then. C.J. Beathard completed 24-of-51 passes for 294 yards with zero passing touchdowns and one interception. Beaty did run one in himself, though.

The 49ers fell 20-10 to the Cardinals and were 0-9 on the season after that game.

As a fan, I felt pretty damn low. We were down bad. There wasn’t much to smile about in those days. Except the following Sunday, the 49ers played the New York Giants. Little Eli Manning in the house! Beathard put on his big boy helmet and went 19-for-25 with 288 yards and two passing touchdowns. Yes, also an INT. However, he ran one in...again!

His real name should be C.J. Runhard.

I was at a bar in Denver, Colorado prior to the Patriots’ Sunday Nighter against the Broncos. My boyfriend and I were having a few beers before the game, which we went to in person as part of a little two-game tilt to watch both of our teams back-to-back (I miss road trips, too). We’re watching the 49ers game and BOOM! They get their first win of the season all the while I’m wearing a Carlos Hyde jersey and a huge genuine, smile. I took a video of myself reacting to the whole situation and it’s pure red and gold.

Despite the team having just one measly win under their belt, I felt pure joy to finally get that win.

I think the same can be said about life. This past year has been a rollercoaster of emotions. Usually we’re riding the Love Train, but with COVID and world issues, this year has been very difficult for so many people. It almost feels like your team just can’t win.

Looking back on the 49ers 2020 season, I feel so much empathy towards those players who found their home on the injured reserve. The team boasted the second-most injuries of any NFL team over the past 20 years. Let that sink in.

We had this miracle season in 2019 where everything was clicking…except in the final quarter of the Super Bowl. We were that close to the trophy. And ever since then, the Great 49ers Quarterback Debate has dominated headlines and given me a real life headache for the dude at the center of it all.

At this point, it seems as though Jimmy Garoppolo will be the 49ers starting quarterback heading into the 2021-22 season. Kyle Juszcyk—who recently signed a 5-year, $27 million extension—was just on Good Morning Football to chime in about the whole thing, too. He seems pretty confident that Jimmy G will be running out of that tunnel at Levi’s Stadium come September 12th, 2021—that’s only 173 days away, by the way.

“Jimmy’s our guy. He’s going to be starting Week 1,” said Juice. “He’s going to do what he does, man. He’s going to get us back to winning.”

The key with Garoppolo comes down to availability. He has all the ability in the world when healthy. Just look at the 49ers record when he’s on the field. As a starter, Garoppolo is 22-8. You can’t really fudge the numbers. Playing devil’s advocate, though, those numbers aren’t possible if Jimmy’s in the stands taking notes.

Trust me, I get the argument on both sides.

I’ve always been a huge Jimmy G supporter. If he’s wearing our colours, he’s my quarterback. That’s how I’ve always been with this team.

My football experience with the 49ers doesn’t run as deep as each person living in San Francisco. I’m not from the Bay Area. I’m not even from the United States. I started following the team in the Alex Smith days. So, I never lived through the Joe Montana or Steve Young era. I don’t know how it feels to watch a dynasty team, nor have I ever witnessed a Super Bowl win as a fan.

For me, Colin Kaepernick and Jimmy Garoppolo are my tiny version of an elite quarterback.

Before you press the cancel button on me, hear me out: In 2012, Kaepernick lit a fire within me as a fan. He was an electric player in that season and nearly helped win us a title. Of course, the power went out and the whole vibe shifted. Plus I still think Ray Lewis’ retirement had a lot to do with the outcome of that game.

Please don’t @ me for my silly conspiracy theories. I’m mostly joking.

The 2019 season made me feel more alive than any other football season I’ve experienced in my fandom so far. Even though the outcome wasn’t exactly what we hoped for, I felt a sense of hope inside myself for the first time in ages.

Regardless of who runs out of that tunnel come September, I’ll be thankful just to watch the sport we love and to feel connected once again. This entire off-season has been filled with scummy headlines and incredibly insensitive comments towards a man who once made so many of us feel what it’s like to be a winner.

Ironically, I’ve never seen Jimmy G play in person. For the entire 2019 year, I didn’t go to a single 49ers game. My superstitious side says I should just stay away from the team if I ever want to see a winning record again.

I don’t actually believe that, don’t worry.

We never really know when we’ll get those wins again. You can’t control when an injury decides to sideline you, just like you can’t really control how people talk about you in the media, too. I’ve been sitting on the bench for the past few months. I was taking notes, just like Garoppolo up in those bleachers. The real bleacher report.

People can write whichever headlines they choose about us, but at the end of the day, we write the headlines of our life.

After my second trip to the injured reserve, I’ve decided to let go of the doubt and drown out the noise. Who knows, maybe Jimmy does the same? I’d love to ask him for advice on how to tune it all out and focus on the grind. Look at the hate spit at him every single day. Would you be okay if the same were happening to you? Sure, he’s paid a lot to deal with it. But no one should wish another injury onto someone just because they don’t like him as a player.

Empathy is something lacking in many parts of society these days, which is a sad truth to an empath like myself.

Maybe the key is to not take things too personally, and instead, store all of the doubt and hate in a fiery ball inside of your soul to use as fuel in whatever it is you’re meant for during your time on this planet.

314 days.

That’s the total amount of days Garoppolo will have missed since the last time he played on November 1st, 2020 until he [most likely] runs out onto the field for the 49ers season-opener on September 12th, 2021. That’s nearly one whole year of recovery.

And hey, we all know what a healthy Jimmy G has up his sleeve.

Juice said it best:

"When he's out there, we win games."