The 49ers "Quantaback" Competition

When viewed through this lens, the current quarterback situation with the 49ers takes shape as a very interesting state of affairs

Quantum Mechanics is still a very mysterious field for humans. While we have made enormous strides, there is still much to learn. For the purposes of this brief essay, let’s agree that we can sum up one of the main elements of QM by stating: “Particles appear to be in multiple locations at once until observed, at which point they coalesce into a perceivable state by the observer.” We can, again for the purpose of brevity, set aside all the mystical implications of this thought and just take it at face value in the ensuing paragraphs.

One way we love to understand things is to compare them at scales which are so far apart as to represent different versions of what we call reality. In the case of QM, we love to use the above metaphor of observation = manifestation scaling it up from it’s sub-microscopic realm and into our own macro reality.

When viewed through this lens, the current quarterback situation with the 49ers takes shape as a very interesting state of affairs. We, the observers, must wait until the moment arrives when the particle, in this case the starting QB in Game 1, appears when we observe collectively who that QB is and how he actually plays.

Until this time, we exist much like a cloud of particles, whereby the starting QB currently takes on many forms and will continue to do so until Sept. 12 at 10:00 a.m. As I write this, the current 49ers QB could be any of the following (metaphoric) particles: Good Jimmy, Bad Jimmy, Hurt Jimmy, Amazing Jimmny, Trey Lance Ready, Trey Lance Not-Quite-Ready, Trey Lance Shredding, Josh Rosen, Nate Sudfeld, DeShaun Watson, Colin Kaepernick and Kyle Shanahan (representing the metamorphic “Charm Spin" QB Particle)

While physicists from Roger Penrose to Lisa Randall and pundits from Grant Cohn to East Bay Chris have submitted many a thesis that claim to show the likelihood of which of these particles will occupy the Space Time Coordinates of W1G1SF49SQB, they are, like the rest of us, ironically frozen in time as we await the actual moment to arrive.

Seeing as both physicists and pundits alike use past events as predictors of a given reality arc, it is not surprising that much film has been reviewed and (in the case of EBC) many sandwiches have been consumed while trying to divine who the starting QB will be Week 1. However, we, the patient fan, can rest assured that neither Garoppolo’s completion rate, nor his epically sculpted calves, nor the exquisite deep completions from Trey and not even the pizza oven receiver of Kyle Shanahan’s glory may serve to predict who exactly will walk out to the huddle when the time comes.

Only Space~Time can unfold until at last the moment finally coalesces and we, the observers, start another magnificent quantum dive into the miraculous future of the 2021 NFL Season.

I for one, cannot wait.

As we also know from physics, photons can travel as both a particle and a wave. This describes all of us actually, each moment of our existence is a particle, and the track of our whole lives is a wave. You can kludge this metaphor onto most scales of reality. A football team is certainly one of them. Each teammate is a particle, the team, a wave. Each game is a particle, the season, a wave. Each Cohn Phone caller a particle, all of them together, a wave.

We see and cheer for and heckle and engage the particles of our favorite and least-favorite players. We agonize over the weekly highs and lows of The Team. We can narrow our focus to the particles or we can widen it to the wave. We observe the particles daily. We are quantum linked to The San Francisco 49ers Wave as fans and observers.

May all particles have a safe and injury-free season as they entertain us.

May the best wave win.