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Skip Bayless Ironically Advises Dallas Cowboys’ Micah Parsons to ‘Grow Up!’

Skip Bayless Ironically Advises Dallas Cowboys’ Micah Parsons to ‘Grow Up!’
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FRISCO - Is it possible that good advice can come from a bad advisor?

Dallas Cowboys fake-fan troll Skip Bayless has taken it upon himself to use his pulpit on national TV - little-watched as it is - to counsel young All-Pro standout Micah Parsons.

Bayless’ lame performance featured the contrarian conman advising Parsons to “wake up” and “grow up”  after Cowboys leader Parsons sounded off at media critics of teammate Dak Prescott.

Said Micah: “I just don’t condone the bashing of Dak Prescott and the Dallas Cowboys ... (critics should) have the same energy for the Eagles. We want the same energy for everybody. Because there’s a whole bunch of bashing when it’s Dak Prescott, but not the same when it’s the Eagles."

Micah, Bayless and Dak

Micah, Bayless and Dak

And of course, Parsons’ evaluation shows wisdom beyond his 24 years. The Cowboys are talked about in ways the other 31 NFL teams are not. Indeed, the national “debate shows” quite likely spend more time dissecting “America’s Team” than they do all the other franchises combined.

So Micah, once he’s made aware of the bias, is right to think it. The issue is, why does he or any other Cowboys player pay attention to this “white noise”? What can Micah Parsons possibly learn about football from sports comedian Stephen A. Smith (whose schtick it to pretend he hates the Cowboys) or from Bayless (whose schtick is to pretend he loves the Cowboys)?

In one sense, Bayless is essentially urging Parsons to quit paying attention to … Bayless and people like him.

"Micah, you have to wake up, you play for the most polarizing team in sports," Bayless said. … and that “polarization” is part of the fun and the frustration of being “America’s Team.”

And yet there is an irony here that is inescapable, and brings into question the validity of anything and everything that oozes out of Bayless’ mouth. 

Skip Bayless is one of the original perpetrators of journalism gone wrong. He has for 30 years falsified stories about sports celebrities, written books questioning everything from the faith of Tom Landry to the sexuality of Troy Aikman. He has doubted the manhood of Dak Prescott and LeBron James. And he is maybe most proud of what he terms his “clever” knack for issuing nicknames. 

So QB Joe Flacco is “Joe Fluke-o.” And QB Kyle Boller is “Kyle ‘I Shoulda Been a Bowler.” And baseball player Jeff Kent is “Jeff Can’t.” And in a weird but running theme that strikes some odd chords, he feminizes the names of male athletes - as when he calls NBA star Chris Bosh “Bosh Spice.”

Unless one is a fan of third-grade-level puns, this junk is more hateful than it is clever. But most of all, what it is is infantile … which is why the reprehensible Skip Bayless’ advice to the Dallas Cowboys to “grow up” positively stinks of irony.